Chiltern publican Adrian Smith a loving partner, parent and mate to all

"From the day I first met him, that's what he called me," Joanne says.

"And one of the last things he said to me was 'I'll always love you because you're my Beautiful'."

On Friday, May 12, the popular Chiltern publican passed away with Joanne, their five children and his mate Michael ("Pickles") Phibbs by his side.

Adrian and Joanne, who've been together for 17 years, had run the Telegraph Hotel since January 2019.

The 45-year-old, who'd always been quick with a beer and banter, was equally quick to put his hand in his pocket to help others.

"Adrian had a very big heart," Joanne says.

"He would have put anybody else before himself."

The couple had made a point of actively supporting the town, hosting weekly raffles for community clubs that saw funds injected into the girl guides, Chiltern Railroaders and Modellers, the men's shed, senior citizens, rodeo and footy club.

In the wake of the Black Summer bushfires of 2020, Joanne and Adrian hosted a major fundraiser to thank the town's emergency services for their efforts.

That generosity was to be repaid a thousand-fold when Adrian received a shock cancer prognosis in September last year.

Tumours that started stealthily in his bowel had spread to his gall bladder and liver, and into lymph nodes around his lungs and liver.

He was given only months to live.

A posse of big-hearted supporters raised a staggering $140,000 in just over a week to help Adrian and his family.

The fundraiser at the Telegraph Hotel saw hundreds of people pour into the pub, spilling out into the beer garden eager to give back to the couple who had given so much to their community.

Those efforts meant Joanne and Adrian were able to embark on one last adventure together, ticking off an item on their bucket list with a trip from Adelaide to the Northern Territory at the end of March.

"We'd always planned to do that big drive together one day," Joanne reflects.

"Adrian loved trains so we decided on The Ghan instead."

Joanne hastily booked the trip after Adrian pulled the pin on treatment.

He'd had enough.

The weekend of the Chiltern rodeo (March 12) Adrian had a "terrible reaction" to medication and he missed the event, run by Pickles.

"He was so upset and he said to me, 'That's the last tablet I'll take, I'm not taking anymore'," Joanne says.

The next weekend, at Yarrawonga, they broke the news to their children that Adrian had stopped all treatment.

Joanne smiles as she recounts the highs and lows of their trip north, with their boat tour to Katherine Gorge a highlight.

"It was pretty cool and Adrian really enjoyed it," she says.

Their first time in Darwin - "you can't swim in all the beautiful water and we didn't realise it's because the jellyfish are that bad" - brought its own excitement when someone tried to break into their first-floor apartment.

Joanne laughs as she recalls Adrian jumping out of bed "quicker than I've seen him move in months", brandishing a broomstick.

"There he was, broomstick in hand, checking under the bed and in cupboards even though we knew the intruder had gone - we laughed about it for days!" she says.

The couple flew from Darwin to Brisbane where they caught up with a friend Adrian had known for 20 years.

"It was really emotional because he knew that would be the last time he'd see his mate," Joanne says.

On the drive back down the coast they stayed on the beach at Coffs Harbour - "Adrian loved the beach" - and dropped in to see his brother's house at Wollongong.

"He was so proud of his brother," Joanne says.

"But he was tired and while we enjoyed the (10-day) trip there was, you know, the not being able to enjoy it," she adds, sadly.

Adrian's funeral will be held at Chiltern's lawn cemetery on Thursday, May 25 at 1pm.

The service and eulogies will be a compilation of "little stories and thoughts from friends and family" led by Joanne's brother-in-law Paul Goonan.

"Everyone saw him in a different way and yet in the same way," Joanne states.

"And for someone who was quite shy, he knew how to make people smile."

Sitting in the beer garden of the pub on Thursday morning - in the same spot that epic fundraiser was held - Pickles reflects on the mate he still can't believe is gone.

"He could mix it with anyone - rich or poor," he offers.

A larrikin, a prankster, a publican, a proud father and a devoted partner.

A man who did a ring-around of many of his friends in the weeks before he died, leaving a heart-felt message: "My bestest mate, just ringin' up to say that I love ya and I'll talk to you soon."

"He wasn't ever afraid to say 'I love you' to his mates, to me or to his kids," Joanne says.

Nowhere was that more evident than in the way Adrian embraced Joanne's four children "as his own".

Between them they raised Emma (now 31), Michael (28), Isabel and Christine (26) and their son together, William (15).

"I'm eight years older and had four children when Adrian met me," Joanne explains.

"It takes a great man to take that on and he spent so much of our time together providing, caring and trying to give them everything he felt he didn't have growing up."

In fact, right up until he died, one of Adrian's big goals was to become a foster parent.

"It's the one thing he would have liked to do and something he talked about a lot when we were away," Joanne reveals.

But, in the end, there just wasn't the time.

He was enormously proud of William and was "so happy" when he'd finished his first day of work placement as a welder.

"It was one of the last conversations we had," Joanne says.

"He also told me he'd miss me and that we would be okay."

If there's one thing Joanne wants to reinforce as part of sharing this very personal story is awareness about the importance of early detection for bowel cancer.

"Get checked," she urges.

"Finding these things early can change the outcome.

"Men tend not to talk about or discuss things and they suffer in silence - I know Adrian did."

For now, the memory Joanne is holding closest to her heart is of the precious last moments before Adrian slipped away.

"He always told me he'd let me know if he was there - and he did," she says.

"And that's all mine!"

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