Around Mates: Scott Vesty opens up for Loneliness Awareness Week

In May 2023, Mr Vesty created the Facebook group Around Mates and told his story.

"Since I was 15 years old I have suffered from depression and anxiety," he wrote.

"I felt like I couldn't confide in my parents or friends that I was struggling, so I suffered in silence for 17 years."

He said that "after coming through the other side of the darkness", he felt compelled to help others do the same.

"This is why I do what I do and am so passionate about it," he wrote. "I will always be here for anyone that is struggling with anything, day or night."

Little did Mr Vesty realise the impact that post would have.

In only three months the group grew to 1400 members, each sharing their own stories, and Mr Vesty now hosts weekly BBQs in 28 towns around the Border.

"I thought something like this was needed, but I didn't know it was needed this badly," Mr Vesty said.

To mark Loneliness Awareness Week 2023 (August 7-13), a report was released highlighting the state of loneliness in Australia.

The sample was comprised of 4026 Australians aged 18 to 92 years old.

It found that almost one in three Aussies feel lonely and one in six are experiencing "severe loneliness".

Surprisingly, it found that young people (18-24 years old) report the highest levels of loneliness followed by middle aged people (45-54).

The report by national organisation Ending Loneliness Together found that loneliness is related to social media addiction.

Overall, 16 per cent of people who are lonely report social media addiction compared with 9 per cent of people who are not lonely.

Psychologist Karen Black of Laneway Counselling in Albury said the findings reflect the impact of social media in young people's lives.

"Social media plays a part in them feeling like they're missing out," she said.

"They're seeing these people have this great time on social media when they're stuck at home or not invited.

"I think that can lead to social isolation and loneliness."

The report found that loneliness is associated with an increased likelihood of having clinical depression and social anxiety.

"But the other side of this is that whilst loneliness can cause mental health problems, mental health problems can cause loneliness," Ms Black said.

"Depression's best friend is loneliness and it will do its best to isolate you from people.

"So at the end of the day, we need to create a sense of community again.

"I think that social media has broken down the community and deteriorated our sense of connection."

After concealing his emotions for 17 years, Mr Vesty's decision to open up felt like a rebirth.

"I wore a mask when I was out in public and in social settings," he said.

"I didn't let people see how I was feeling, but then once I told people like my parents and friends, it was like a weight was lifted and I didn't have to pretend if I was having a down day, I could say something.

"So from my experience once someone does come out and say, look, I am struggling, I can guarantee that it'll make a huge difference."

The report outlined steps toward healing the loneliness problem in Australia, which included normalising conversations about loneliness and empowering communities to help each other.

"I just want people to know that they're not alone," Mr Vesty said.

"Around Mates is somewhere the members can talk about stuff in private. They know they're not going to be judged, they're not going to be ridiculed, there's no keyboard warriors, there's none of that, just support."

Mr Vesty hopes that Around Mates will continue to grow to a national level.

"I just hope it makes people aware that they aren't alone and they have got people out there that do care and want to help.

"So if you are going through a rough period, hold on, and know that there's support out there."

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